Help TARA Evalute Your Shame Experiences

Shame is an emotion that is generally misunderstood. Unfortunately, it appears to be a painful emotion that is frequently experienced by people with BPD. TARA is attempting to shine light on what the experience of shame feels like in order to motivate new research and foster compassion for those who experience shame as a core component of their sense of self.
We at TARA thank you for taking the time to share your painful experiences with us so that the emotion of shame receives the attention it deserves in the BPD research community. 
Guilt: A feeling of having done something wrong or failed in an obligation.
Guilt is a cognitive or an emotional experience that occurs when a person realizes or believes—accurately or not—that he or she has compromised his or her own standards of conduct or has violated a moral standard, and bears significant responsibility for that violation. It is closely related to the feeling of remorse.
                    “I did a bad thing, however I can apologize or make amends.”

Embarrassment: A feeling of self-consciousness, shame, or awkwardness.
Embarrassment is an emotional state of intense discomfort with oneself, experienced when a socially unacceptable act or condition is witnessed by or revealed to others. It usually involves some amount of loss of honor or dignity.
                    “I’ve been exposed as having done something bad.”

Humiliation: Feeling ashamed and foolish as a result of the injury to one’s dignity and self-respect, especially publicly.
Humiliation is the abasement of pride, which creates mortification or leads to a state of being humbled or reduced to lowliness or submission. It is an emotion that is felt when a person feels their social status has just decreased.
                     “I’ve been publically exposed as bad, foolish, or inadequate.”

Shame: A negative and painful feeling in which the entire self is viewed as bad and/or worthless.
Shame is a negative, painful, social emotion that can be seen as resulting from one’s actions or feelings being compared to one’s self-expectations or standards.
                     “I am bad.” “I am a bad person.”

* 1. Which of the following four words describe how you generally feel about yourself (most often)?

* 2. In your own words, describe the feeling you experience most often.

* 3. If you have experienced shame, please describe your experience.

* 4. Which of the following do you implement most often to help you cope with feelings of shame?

* 5. Have the feelings of shame been addressed in therapy?

* 6. If yes, what kind of therapy was it?

* 7. Does the feeling of shame depend on a situation in the moment or is it a pervasive, consistent feeling?

* 8. Are you male or female?

* 9. What is your age?