Tight Pants Installer Caption Contest Question Title * 1. Select your favorite caption! I don't always install wood flooring in cowboy boots. But when I do, I make sure to wear my stonewashed jeans. Everybody's talkin' bout my tight pants, I got my tight pants on...the only way to lay a wood floor, is in my tight pants, I got my tight pants on. My name is Borat, I am #1 Floor guy in all of Uzbekistan! Like a rhinestone hardwood cowboy... Gotta finish this bowling alley so I can get to the rodeo tonight!!! I wish I was still in my name is earl. I think he works for FBI - Flooring Bureau of Installations and he most likely sings "Bad Floors, Bad Floors what you gonna do? What you gonna do when we..." I buried her under the floorboard. I need to restock my candy supply before the school bell rings at 2:30... Im ron jeremy. They misunderstood me when I said I can put the hardwood down. I got the boots and the stache now where is my mariachi band Arriba. Ron Jeremy had to start somewhere ! He wasn't always a porn star .he was nailing floors before nailing people!!! Hmm I maybe should kept with the times and left these boots and pants in the 80s. She thinks my boots are sexy! Who the heck racked this so close!? Don't hit my foot. don't hit the foot. Am I the only guy here with style? Hi my name is Earl. Do good things and good things happen. I can't bend in these tight pants. Someone should invent a pneumatic one of these! Damn, I didn't want to be up here. I should've sat in the back of the class. As soon as w get this done we can do sum line dancing yee haa. The last job paid for these boots. This one will pay for my Stetson. Rule #1...never install flooring without tight pants. Wow, I feel like a Jack ass. Shouldn't have wore these pants today.. Or ever. Thank goodness I left my elvis cape home I am getting hot. Even Elvis likes to install a hardwood floor!! Tired of these soles coming off these boots in going to power nail them this time. I wonder if I could power this nailer with air... Come have a blast on our new dance floor," they said! $&@%#!!! I'm too sexy for this floor! I don't have a college education, any flooring experience, and cant read a tape, but I'm worth 50$ hour running this nailer. Wish I hadn't wore my tight jeans... I gotta finish this floor before Disco is Dead! My back will never be the same. I'm gonna keep my pant legs pulled up just incase it foods. Now back to installing. These boots were made for nailin'. I can't wait for them to invent pneumatic nailers. With these jeans a short handle is not a good option. Damn I can't wait for them to come out with pneumatic flooring guns. I can only install 30 feet till my arm is tired. Yes gentleman , with a lot of work your quality can match my own . Sadly none of you will ever look this good installing hardwood floor. Smart casual, they said! You won't have to do any nailing, they said!!! @@&***!!!!@...Did somebody just take a picture???!!!! This is awkward, wrong class, how do I get out of here without anyone noticing...this is not Wood Flooring Sales 101. There goes my back again! I'm the proud owner of Pulp Fiction Hardwood Floors. What was I thinking when I got dressed this morning??? Is that my name is earl? Cheer up guys. I'm doing all the work. I KNEW that those years of Croquet would pay off. I wonder if anybody's noticed that my pants are only painted on? :D Lord have mercy, baby's got his blue jeans on!!! Geez, I am hopin I don't get all sweaty so I can go pick up chicks after this...... You should never let your customer try out your nailer on his floor no matter how much experience he says he has. If I hit this wrong, will the wood split 1st or my pants?!? Am I cool or what? I can't believe I have to install MY OWN dance floor for these competitions! Remember, if you move the nailer over 2 inches, you can staple you foot to the floor and be off on disability for 6 months. "Honky Tonk Hardwood, Inc." at your service! I get this dance floor done in here and park my IROC next to it, the ladies will be lined up around the block. With an audience like this I should have wore my outfit with the sequins. Let me finish nailing this row & will be ready for some line dancing... The snake I nailed on the last job sure provided some cool boots. Sing along! You can nail my floor, My achy breaky floor ..... The boss said if i rack and nail 400 ft by 3 i get Bee Gees tickets!!! You can tell by the way ....i nail this rack im a womans man...no time to talk! Jimmy tight pants...Part of the FBI relocation program. "Geez I hope Tommy Two Toes or Joey bag o donuts don't recognize me"...Forget about it. Table tops ready for you all sizes shapes and species Specify shipping directions. Sure hope my plumbers butt aint showing. "Can You Say", "Oooh Yaaa" Smooooth Operator" Submit